A Mostly True Story|
by Glenn Campbell
Hello, my name is Psychospy, and I am a recovering addict. For years, I obsessively collected data: dates, times, locations, lighting conditions, number of witnesses, nature of contact. I recorded my data in notebooks, in computer files, on film and on magnetic tape. I sorted, analyzed, parsed and tabulated my data to try to tease out subtle inferences. And now I see that it doesn't make a whit of difference. Sometimes, you get so caught up in data that you miss the big picture, like when you've got your face down in the dirt looking for landing traces and a big ol' saucer flies right over your head. I am not ashamed to admit it now: I was seduced by data. I thought that all you needed to do was collect enough information and all the mysteries of the universe would be solved. I was wrong. Information is something "out there," outside of you. It is infinite, and you are never going to collect enough of it. To solve the mysteries of the universe, you need to find something inside yourself. It is painfully obvious to me now: The aliens are here, among us, and all we have to do is lay down our pencils and open our eyes.
In a storage unit, I have dozens of boxes and filing cabinets, containing, in pieces, a detailed chronicle of the entire Area 51 mission. I am not going to look at any of it. Opening even one box is like an alcoholic opening a bottle of whiskey to take "just one swig." I have made so much progress that I can't afford to backslide now. God knows, there is plenty of information available already. Area 51 was, for a time, the center of a media storm. There were hundreds of newspaper and magazine articles, dozens of TV shows and news segments, and tens of thousands of pages on the internet, many of them written by me. I am not going to look at any of those, either. This book, by necessity, will be as free of data as possible; otherwise, it would never be written.
In this book, I am not going to be too concerned about the sequence of events or whether something happened in 1994 or 1995. I am sure you can look up these things yourself if you need to. What I am going to give you instead is the contents of my brain. You can think of this book as a sort of oral history, where some old geezer talks to you for hours about what happened in some misty yesteryear. You have to understand that although the old guy is being truthful, not everything he says is true, due to the fog of memory and some slight dramatic license. Oral histories always come across as more epic and meaningful than the events ever seemed at the time, and some memories, while accurate in feeling, are plainly wrong in fact. You need to filter for these things when you listen to me, and you should also use your own judgment before you, say, walk off a cliff based on what I tell you about the mutable nature of gravity.
One advantage of writing a data-free book is that I don't have to answer my critics, who crop up again and again in the information stream. I have heard all of their charges. Some call me a charlatan, a grandstander, a profiteer. Others have even claimed that I am a government operative, sent to Area 51 to "muddy the waters." I will not dignify these claims with a reply, except to answer the profiteering charge. UFO research is a vicious, mud-slinging field that has soiled many a man's reputation. No one comes out of it clean, but I hope that history will see my intentions as pure. I want to make it clear that I have never tried to profit from my Space Brothers (until, perhaps, I wrote this book). When I came to Nevada, it was with the noblest of motives. I never intended to become a celebrity or the center of a phenomena. There was too much at stake to be seeking fame or money. All really wanted was the truth, or, barring that, a really cool adventure.
I know they are still talking about me on the internet. They ask: Where have I been for the past ten years? Why have I remained silent? I seemed to have set myself up as a leader, then vanished, leaving the flock to wander alone. Was I abducted? Was I co-opted by the government? I wish I could tell you about those seven years, but now is not the time. I hope it is sufficient that I am back now and willing to reveal everything, except about that missing time.
Whenever Area 51 is mentioned, people ask, "Is is true?" To this I reply: "Yes it is, all of it, whatever you want." Are there extraterrestrials at Area 51? Yes, there are. I have met them, and I know they come from other planets because they told me so. Is there a government conspiracy to cover up the truth? Of course. What else would you expect from a secret military base that does not appear on any map? Are aliens in an underground facility abducting human babies which they turn into a fine pâté that they spread on their skin for nutritional value? On this, I reserve judgment, since I have not yet visited that facility or interviewed those particular aliens. This is not the weirdest thing I have heard, however, and I don't want to discount one person's report without checking out the facts (which, of course, I can no longer do since I stopped collecting data).
All of this may sound like a tall tale, but I swear that everything in this book is true, or at least the truth as I remember it. I do not deny the possibility of false memories implanted in my brain by government elements, but to me, this was real, and I hope you don't think I am crazy.